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Friday, August 22, 2014
You know when you've had a really bad day and you kind of just shout to the world "what else can go wrong today? what else are you going to throw at me?" Then maybe you would feel like sticking both your middle fingers out to everyone that passes by. Well that was me today and thats still me right now.
Everything that could go wrong has gone wrong. My wonderful day started at 3 am and not even an hour later I almost get into a pretty bad car accident on my way to work. Then there was work and my boss asked me to stay later than I had planned. Which ends up ruining my plans for later on in the day. I couldn't get my oil changed because every mechanic in the town that I live in is booked, which pissed me off. I then almost got into another car accident and this time the person who almost hits me yells at me "do you have a problem?!" It wasn't even my fault jackass, it was yours.
Then I get a text from someone who I have been avoiding pretty much all month. I do not like this person because I always feel empty when I'm around them. I tend do these things to myself though. I hang out with the wrong type of person who makes me feel empty at the end of the day but hey. It's kind of what I'm used to. I've done some pretty stupid stuff these past few months that left me feeling empty and I'm sick and tired of falling into this trap again and again.
I end up having to cancel my plans with another person who I actually wanted to hang out with because I was just laying in bed crying my make up off.
I became another heart breaker for the millionth time. This seems like its all I ever do. I think thats why karma has bitten me many times.
I became another heart breaker for the millionth time. This seems like its all I ever do. I think thats why karma has bitten me many times.
My best friend left for school this morning (she goes to school in Indiana) and my other best friend has some issues at her apartment. My sister is at work. And I said something horrible to my mom today and I wish I could take it back, so we really aren't talking. I need someone to vent to, so I'm writing this down, here, for random people around the world to read. All in all, I'm just feeling pretty lonely today and not myself. I'm not one to be sad and talk about how sucky my life is because I hate that kind of attention. But I have to let this out somehow.
I know that tomorrow may be a little better. I know that these next few weeks will be the beginning of a new season in my life. I know that things will look up eventually. We all have bad days, but today just seems to be one of the worst.
I just need to apologize to my mother, cry a little more, become a little stronger, cuddle up in my bed, and hope and pray that this weekend will turn out better.
Thanks for reading this…if you are. At least I got to vent to someone. I promise I'm not always this emo. Love you.
4 comments
First, I am so so so SOOOOO so glad you didn't get in any car accidents and that you are safe. And my dear friend, you were not alone, today was the definition of suck for me as well and I'm happy it's over. Vent away! Never apologize for feeling a certain way, you should always vent. And when it comes to people who are toxic, it's always hard but you'll always feel better to rid them from your life completely, sorry to hear that they are bothering you.
ReplyDeleteIt's always nice to surround yourself with people whom you love, but sometimes being alone and crying out your frustrations is also needed.
Wish we could have planned a shopping date before school started, for clothes...yes, but going shopping for school supplies is always my favorite. New pens and notebooks....swoon. :3 I hope all is well with you and your mom. Don't worry, moms always forgive their daughters, even when they say not-so-nice-things. <3<3<3 Sending you love and hugs.
Kimmy, you are the definition of awesome. I can't wait for school to start so I can see and hang out with you more.
DeleteDuuude I should have asked you to go shopping with me because I was wanting to do that this summer!! Oh well, we can always plan a shopping day some other time :) I think Buffalo Exchange will be in our future! And yes school supplies as well! I think the best part of the school year is buying a planner. My heart always races as I'm choosing the perfect one for the school year. Nerd yes, but I have a feeling that you will agree.
xo
I love you!!
I am sorry that you had such a rough day. :(
ReplyDeleteAbout being a heart breaker: Don't feel guilty. It's better to be honest with someone and not waste their time. I rejected a few guys (but was also rejected by a few) before I met my husband. I'm glad that I didn't settle for someone whom I didn't have the right feeling about.
Thank you for your kind words!
DeleteIt always seems as though I break hearts even when I truly don't mean to. Oh well. I think I'm just too nice haha.
Thank you for commenting and being so sweet!!
xoxo