Last week was good to me. It was filled with good company from friends, meeting new faces, and striking up those types of conversations that really get your heart beating a little faster because you are letting out every bit of emotion that is in you. During those conversations you don't care what they learn about you or if they'll judge you. You just know that they are there listening and really thats all that anyone can do with me right now is just listen.
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I chiseled out another pathway into my already confusing scary future…meaning I changed my major again. This time will definitely be the last time. I have a goal and you better believe I'm going to stick to it.
I can't wait to have some overly stressed out college student come to me years down the road gasping for hope and breath because they won't know which major to choose. Thats when I'll let out a small laugh followed with a sigh and say "my dear I was in the exact same boat as you, let me tell you a little story…." Then that student will tell their friends my story, and they will tell their friends, it will be a forever game of telephone, and my story of Not Knowing What Major To Choose will forever be engraved into the minds of college kids everywhere. They'll all remember me when they lay in bed at night thinking about their future. I would become the Mother Teresa to 20 somethings all over this world. They would write articles and books about me. Quotes of my story will be placed into graduation speeches everywhere.

Maybe things won't be that extreme. But it's okay to dream every once in a while.
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I have found out recently that when I'm sad the best place for me to go is the fine arts museum. I went the day after you left, just because I felt the need to go, and as I found myself standing in front of some of my favorite paintings I cried. They were tears of sadness, mixed in with astonishment, mixed in with the final realization of where I should be.
I found myself needing to go again last week so I went once more and this time, with a friend. I had different senses come out of me that I couldn't quite put my finger on. But they were nice.
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I still have been missing you. But I have found that as the weeks go by the days that I let out some of those sad tears seem to be less and less. Hopefully soon I'll get to the point where I don't think about you as much. But I don't think that I will ever stop thinking about you. Mainly because I really do love the smile that comes across my face when I think of those sweet memories that we had together. I keep saying this to myself, but I just don't understand why I feel this way. And I may never understand.
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I am looking forward to this month though. October is the season of new beginnings. Meaning the beautiful changes in the weather, the start of the holiday season, the changing of my wardrobe because hello cooler temps, and always the start of new goals.
I'm going to attempt to make cronuts this month. Yes y'all heard me right. Cronuts. Emma Chapman put out a new recipe and I'm going to try and incorporate some unique flavors into them. Hopefully they will turn out okay.
I may begin to do my christmas shopping this month also…and christmas crafting. Eeeek excitement y'all.

xo